It’s Complicated – Pastors Kirk & Suzette Bowman
There are all kinds of dynamics in marriage. Some people are happily married and some are unhappily married. Some want to get married and some wish they never had. Some have been married but are no longer. This message is for everyone – no matter where you find yourself!
Genesis 2:18-24 Then the Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. And the man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh at that place. And the Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. And the man said, "This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man." For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.
Marriage is God’s idea. Before government and before the church was created, God created marriage. It is the foundation of society where a man and a woman would become one, and share the journey of life together.
Marriage was created by God and defined by God as a lifelong, covenantal partnership between a man and a woman.
Ephesians 5:22-33 shows us how a marriage is a picture of Jesus’ love for the church. We can also say that Jesus’ love for the church shows us what our marriages should look like.
Here are five ways to make your marriage great:
1. Marriage is a holy thing - not just a happy thing
The idea of marriage is a holy thing but God wants it to be fun, fulfilling and lasting. Because marriage is holy, it deserves our very best. A strong marriage will make for a strong household.
2. Great marriages ride on great trains of thought
2 Corinthians 10:5 We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ
Trains of thought take you places. You can get on a negative train of thought or a positive train of thought. Make the choice to get on the train that says, “My marriage is going to be great.”
Love your spouse wholeheartedly and forever. It is a choice.
3. Marriage is a long-term commitment
Close the back door, lock it, and throw away the key. Don’t let divorce be an option.
4. Self-centeredness is your enemy
Self-denial is an important part to any relationship. Treat self-centeredness as the issue, not the other person. Your desire cannot always come above the other persons. Think about what the other person would like, not just about what you want. “We” is better than “me.”
5. The Holy Spirit wants to help your marriage.
Without the Holy Spirit’s help, we would all struggle to walk this out.
The book of Ephesians instructs us to “submit to one another.” It seems hard and impossible and it is except by the power of the Holy Spirit. That is the Spirit-filled life.
The Christian life is not hard, it’s impossible. The Christian marriage is not hard, it’s impossible without the help of the Holy Spirit.
We want to see fun, life-giving, lasting marriages! Take these principles, apply them to your life, and watch your marriage change!